Real Estate for Introverts

Are you an introvert? Are you struggling to find success because the traditional lead generation tactics don’t work for you? Are you tired of being told to do more of the same stuff that doesn’t work for you, doesn’t make you happy, and ultimately, makes you wonder why you got into this business in the first place?

Ashley Harwood is an introvert who started out as a full-time solo agent for 6 years in Massachusetts. But she was burnt out by the training that told her to cold call, door knock, cold call, door knock, and then cold call and door knock again. It drained her energy and made her feel exhausted and burnt out. She knew there had to be a better way.

Ashley was doing the cold calling, door knocking, networking, and one on ones. She wasn’t getting the results she wanted. The one thing she was getting was exhausted. She learned to pare down the activities and do fewer things really well, to avoid the shame spiral of constantly not doing things she enjoyed, therefore not getting results.

The theme of Ashley’s business is that your business can look however you want it to look.

Introverts have a few super powers. One, they’re very good at going deep with people and building relationships faster. These things are great for generating referrals. Two, their ability to listen is incredible. People love to be listened to, and HEARD. Use these two superpowers to create deep, meaningful relationships. Then, when those people you’ve built relationships with need you, they’ll come to you.

Ashley finds that the best time to bring up business with a new connection is simple: ask them what they do for a living. And when they ask “What do you do for work?” that’s when you bring it up. After that, sprinkle real estate details into the conversation often. “I’ll be at a showing,” “I have an open house this weekend,” etc. Conversations lead to contracts.

Introverts need to set boundaries early on in a relationship. Use verbal and nonverbal communication to do so. For instance, make sure you don’t respond too quickly when your client reaches out, otherwise you’ll set up an expectation of quick responses. Loyal clients won’t walk away and find someone else just because you took a little time to respond. The ones who stick around are better leads, people you’d prefer to work with anyway. Referrals are going to be more respectful than internet leads in these cases. Which is why Ashley would rather work with 5 good leads than 50 internet leads.

Some followup strategies Ashley recommends: send out emails, texts, grab some coffee. Have enough touch points, but not too many. Have a client party for everyone who would or has sent you a referral. Create opportunities to mingle in smaller groups, with people that you know, controlling the environment.

It shouldn’t hurt to generate leads. If the traditional methods aren’t working, it's hard on the agent. They feel discouraged and frustrated, ineffective and exhausted. When you identify what works for you, you can succeed. Find the way that works for you that feels enjoyable.

When adopting your own lead generation techniques, do not try to change your personality. It comes off as fake. It’s also an exhausting energy suck. Instead, be your most authentic self. Wear and drive what you want. You will attract the clients who want to work with you. Many people don’t want that aggressive, high-energy person to work with. You will be a breath of fresh air when you aren’t like that with them. They’re going to love you and send you all of their referrals. Don’t try to impress everyone. Be YOU, and you will attract people.

There are more introverts at the head of business than you think. It’s all about making the human to human connection. If you can make better connections with fewer people, that will go a long way. Ashley helps people do just that.

Ashley has a course for introverted agents. It is 90 minutes. In the first hour, she discusses energy management, how that translates into your calendar, and practical ways to take time off. Then the last 30 minutes, she talks about how to find the appropriate lead generation strategy for YOU. She teaches one-on-one classes as well, and group courses for brokerages.

Books recommended in this podcast are Quiet by Susan Cain, The One Thing by Gary Keller, and Stillness is the Key by Ryan Holiday.

Ashley has workshops happening next week. Her website it

Till Next Time,

Johnny Mo

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